Thursday, November 12, 2015

Four Main 'Anti-Twilight' Complaints that Stephenie Meyer Should be Apologizing for... Because of the 'accidental' over-obsessions she caused ADULT women who HIDE behind the obsessions of Young Girls

*I* didn't create this photo; and it came long
before my blasphemy hit the TwiScene.
(along with many others like it)
It doesn't look like a grown woman
made it, does it?
Who does Twilight belong to, TwiLadies?!!
The reason why these anti-twilight blogs are still here and relevant, is because of Hollywood’s emotionally-harsh, misogynistic and apparently never-ending campaign against Twilight & Anti-fans of all ages. The controversy of Fifty Shades of Grey has more to do with the affect Stephenie Meyer’s amateur writing had on older women like Erika. So yeah, these blogs have four main complaints:

1) I abhor how Twilight’s young (and young-at-heart) fans have been treated by Hollywood since long before Kristen Stewart’s super-hyped ‘cheating’ scandal with Rupert Sanders - especially the ‘clueless’ fans who are/were probably the most embedded in their obsessions; and who have had the hardest time dealing with tabloid rumor-lies: one misogynistic stunt after another; and anything to stir up more imaginary hate for money.

Hollywood, you made young girls CRY and you didn't write ONE DAMN GOOD SONG LYRIC to do it! I am not impressed…

2) I have a serious problem with all the anti-twilight haters who have somehow turned into the WORST anti-fans or superfans of Kristen Stewart and/or Robert Pattinson. Did you know that these are the majority of know-it-alls who are so mean in online comments; and did you also know that the majority of these ‘fans’ are older ‘robsessed’ women? (Keep reading, I’ve got all kinds of stuff to back that up – or you can go do the research yourself. It’s fun! ;)

3) Fifty Shades of Grey originally being Twilight-inspired fanfiction; and then being published with as much professional negligence – and even more harmful on society in dynamic, hardcore ways. (Oh yeah, I will talk about how Twilight inspired 50 Shades; along with what’s wrong with it, and how – specifically – is it harmful.)

4) Stephenie Meyer and her ‘professional’ publishers and production franchise caused all this chaos in so many ridiculous and preventable ways. The Twilight Saga was an accident/mistake from page one. No other professional book publisher would ever have published a book with that much dysfunction intact for young adult audiences, especially.

No other author has ever accidentally-caused so much deep-seeded hate, division and misogyny around the world or among their own fanbase. The list of Stephenie Meyer’s offenses is sickening; and much moreso now ‘after the fact’ since she has always refused to acknowledge or take responsibility for them.

This blog has been active since November 2011 with thousands of Twilight & Anti-Twilight Fan visits (scroll down for side counter); along with, no-doubt - Stephenie Meyer's 'professional' cronies and Hollywood journalists who are researching Twilight for this year’s anniversary. (Searches on the ‘pros and cons of twilight over twelve years’ are probably journalist-type searches. No, I’m not stupid.)

But, this isn’t really a newsworthy blog for any of you ‘journalists’ to reference, is it? I mean, it’s not like any of you are about to admit that you have done anything wrong. Ever. You were/are all well within your ‘rights’ to mistreat young girls as blatantly and misogynistically as you have. EVERY Hollywood ‘journalist’ is responsible for NOT PUTTING A STOP TO IT!!! (Yeah, bold, all-caps like this is a rude shout, you JERKS!!!)

Even if Kristen Stewart ‘really’ cheated on Robert Pattinson… The misogynistic bullying by paparazzi & tabloids should have been long over by now. Just like Tiger Woods & Arnold Schwarzenegger‘s real & multiple adulterous offenses combined have been. The basic Human Rights of ‘Life, Liberty & Pursuit of Happiness’ should apply as much to Kristen and Robert as to any other person on this planet.

Also, Kristen Stewart didn't create the insulting 'placeholder' character of Bella Swan that she has defended over and over again. And, Robert Pattinson didn’t create the offensive sparkling vampire of Edward Cullen… The world should really get over that and give them both credit for putting up with so much hate from so many Anti-Twilight fans for so long because of it; as well as for putting up with overly-possessive & obsessive semi-crazy fangirlz of all ages who have overly-imagined loving Kristen and/or Robert for so long. How many people out there would have survived that without coming out the other side unjaded? Some can hardly handle one significant other for very long, ha! ;)

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart both deserve a huge break by their fans and the world.
All celebrities need these reforms and have for a long time – this isn’t a new debate.
It is time for adults to start caring about the constant assaults on the hearts and
minds of people beyond the physical condition of their bodies. Suicide has been
an increasing and concerning factor; and the job of the entertainment industry
is to ENTERTAIN. Free Speech was never meant to protect lies for profits.


The 'Cheating' Scandal: was it real or a staged

showmance to promote Breaking Dawn?



What did tabloid gossip rumors accomplish
with this
'anti-twilight' smear campaign against
Robert Pattinson?

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

How to Sooth an Intense Twilight, Edward Cullen, Robert Pattinson and/or 'robsten' Obsession and Still Move Forward in Your Life

Update 8/28/15 - Okay, mean 'robsessed' girls... YOU do not need to send me emails about how you are okay in your 'anti-twilight' obsessions while at the same time butchering Kristen Stewart. I'm sorry, that girl did NOT 'ruin' anything; NOR is it her fault that so many people accidentally became overly-obsessed with her and/or Robert Pattinson.

An obsession is an obsession. You can either utilize this information and feel better; or not - the choice is your's.
------------------------------

The Nutshell Version
The long version beneath this includes exerpts from people about their obsessions. There is also a 3rd section - how to get over Robert Pattinson or Kristen Stewart (instead of Twilight). Just keep scrolling down toward the end until you see Rob's pictures.

This post was created for absolutely everyone who struggles with a Twilight (or anti-twilight - yes!!) obsession - even the mean girls - because so many of them simply do not realize what they are doing and/or cannot stop themselves. Strong obsessions are hard for most people to control, no matter what they are obsessing over.

This post is designed to help obsessing fans feel better - NOT 'get rid of' an obsession. Most fans do not want it to go away, they just want a little more control in their lives and/or to feel better about it. Because no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a Twilight obsession if you have one. ...And besides, the obsession will drift away slowly, eventually - like it is supposed to.

But, how to manage it while it is so strong and still move forward in your life? That is the burning question... :)

I get letters from obsessing young girls (and moreso from big ones) who cannot talk to their friends or moms about this - or anyone else that they know around them - because they get made fun of and/or told that they 'need help'. And of course, some fans are hung up on Kristen Stewart and some hate her, now - yet another division among friends & family.

And it's all so silly so it doesn't get taken seriously... These obsessions really are quite funny and heartbreaking at the same time.

Some of us are more susceptible to falling into fictional obsessions than others - just like some people have an easier time falling into 'actual' drugs. A Twilight addiction is a drug - hands down, no-doubt.

Obsessions like this create the emotional highs that we crave like a heroine addict craves the way heroine makes them feel. And, make no mistake, this addiction is just as hard to get past - it just doesn't (usually) manifest in ways that makes us change our lives considerably or cause us to die.

Plus, we can't help it for a while; and it is silly... is it any wonder that we get made fun of?

Relax. Your mind is fixated because there is something about it that you miss - or want - or need, etc. You'll figure it out; and when you don't need it anymore... Weeeeeeeeeeee. ;)

I've been all kinds of obsessed with different things throughout my life - people, shows, characters, etc; but I have never had an obsession hit me so hard so fast. That is why I started researching The Twilight Saga and how it was written... I was like, wtf?!!

My Twilight obsession was like quicksand - the more I fought it and tried to 'get out'; the more I sank - and I have heard similar descriptions from many other obsessing fans about the struggle with their obsessions.

Most of us have Bella re-written in our heads to be 'more like us'; or at least, someone we would like to be. (More explanation about that in here - Why do so many people hate Bella Swan and/or Kristen Stewart)

That is why I suggest that you continue to 'glide' through your obsession for a while longer... 
Since you can't turn obsessions on/off like a light switch - and we are NOT talking about an addiction as dangerous as meth - it is okay to take the long way around.

It's okay, because most of us are taking these characters and this story and 'doing what we want' with them, now. This is semi-healthy fantasy play that has the potential to help you realize some of your own dreams and maybe even how to attain them.

What are you doing with the characters? What are you often talking about in their conversations? Where are you trying to make them go... Those are the important questions. The obsession 'can' just be used as a tool instead of an obstruction in your life.

This is 'why' we are all got so unusually-addicted to Twilight - because of the too-shallow characters & storyline that ARE typical of amateur writers - very typical. This is where Steph's publishers and editors should have insisted that she flesh these things out for YA readers AND for their moms, even more!!

Most people think about the character of Bella as Bella; but the obsession is so strong because the line between her and you is probably a lot more thin than you realize. You've probably done things to 'personalize' Bella. For instance, *I* made her a writer. (I was also trying to get Edward and the Cullens to build her a ship to take her into space because I'm such a scifi nut, LoL!)

Change her name and make her 'you' - it would be the same difference. Some ladies literally cannot separate themselves from Bella in their minds, yet - especially people who also read the books; but 'just' movie fans can have problems with this, too.

In order to use your fantasies to get out of the obsession; the variations that come up in your mind (my mind, anyway) seemed like steps. I think because we are meshing the obsession with real life - the real life 'thread' kind of acts like a rope to help us pull ourselves out.

Plus again, can help us realize stuff about ourselves that we needed to know.

I don't mean that we take the time to sit down and actually 'rewrite' Bella, of course - but, we have variations of subtle (and sometimes major) alterations about her and/or Edward that make us like her better. For instance, *my* Bella doesn't have to beg Edward for anything; and he isn't saving her over and over again because she's a weak human.

When we make the fantasy / obsessions 'ours' instead of Stephenie's (that's what it originally was); then it seems easier to pull ourselves out and learn from it. You can even go so far as to use the characters as 'imaginary friends' as long as you need them in your real life. They can actually help iron out the most ridiculous things (especially Alice, ha!) when you are talking to them/yourself.That isn't 'being crazy' - that is being extremely creative in using your imagination to get you out of a potent addiction.

I cannot tell you how many long, ridiculous conversations I've had with Edward Cullen about anything and everything. That is one aspect of the 'universal female fantasy' that Stephenie captured very well - we LIKE our fantasy men to be interested in what we are saying, no matter what, ha!


No, I haven't found my rl Edward yet and I will probably never make it into space, ha! But dreams can lead us to real happiness - if there is such a thing.

Good Luck!! If you need help or a vent - email me: Catherine, auntmisfitchick@gmail.com



Do you want more explanation about how/why some got so crazy?
and why so many fans of ALL AGES - and especially older women -
became so addicted.  This post also includes a link to every other
post or article I have written about the subject; because this is where it all started.
This was written one month after the misogynistic 'cheating' scandal, August 2012.
This post gives us all a REASON to FORGIVE overly-obsessing
Twihards & Anti-Twihards who just CAN'T seem to get a grip on reality. :)

I wrote this post shortly after the cheating scandal started on 7/24/12 to help explain to clueless and/or young Twilight Fans WHY so many of us OLDER TwiLadies are so ridiculously hung-up on this silly saga; and WHY so many of them have ALWAYS BEEN so MEAN about it.

The only reason I continued to explore Twilight obsessions and try to explain them was because of this damn 'cheating' scandal - so that people who needed an explanation for all the rage and hate could have one. It makes it easier to 'see all sides' other than just your own - which makes it easier to at least 'let it go', if not forgive, mean fans.

The Long Version

This is going to seem like a long-winded ramble. But, trust me, I've been there ahead of you and made it! If you are struggling with an intense obsession over Twilight, Edward Cullen, Bella Swan, Kristen Stewart or Robert Pattinson... You are not alone or unusual; and a long, slow read is probably better for your brain. Just take this one line/word/paragraph at a time and save it to return to later if you need it.

I am including a current email from a mom in this beginning so you can see how fans are (still) dealing with their obsessions. No one is talking about this stuff – you’ll hear the typical reason why fans don’t talk about it in this exchange.

This is a reply to a question that shoots off from the reviews of Twilight on Amazon. There are over six thousand replies to this question, most of them similar to this one. Read more if you need more convincing.

For so many Twihards - past & present - Twilight obsessions are NOT 'normal' obsessions.

"I feel just crazy. My poor family!! I can't even count how many times I've read the first two. And yes, what little of Midnight Sun is available, I've read twice. At first, I thought reading it from Edward's perspective would finally settle my obsession - because I realized the second (or was it third?!) time I read Twilight that I was re-reading just trying to figure out what Edward was thinking. But then of course, Midnight Sun isn't finished - so I'm still left wondering. And then of course I'm hoping she'll do the same thing for the other titles. I'm reading New Moon today - and keep wondering what's going on in Edward's mind."

NEWS FLASH... NEWS FLASH... NEWS FLASH... Not everything is about "our obsession" - MOST of your obsessions out there are FINEIt's the pain that comes from seeing your favorite fairytale and favorite actress and actor being so tormented by your own Twihard Sisters and the world that is harsh.

Aside from the issues surrounding Twilight's celebrities, many fans are simply dealing with 'missing' more Twilight, especially since Bdp2 is over. For still others, your obsessions kind of crossover into a grey area in between.

It would be so helpful if Summit / Lionsgate could come up with a continuing series or something - if they could manage to 'do it right'. Twihard fans didn't deserve to have their favorite fairytale ruined by Hollywood's celebrity-lifebashing ways. The likelihood of the studio finding a way to continue this series before the scandal happened was probably pretty high. Twilight had been nothing but profitable up to that point.

Here is one of my original posts about Twilight obsessions (don't read this, yet - you'll come to it again); and why so many fans of ALL AGES - and especially older women - became so addicted. This gives us all a reason to forgive overly-obsessing Twihards & Anti-Twihards out there who just CAN'T seem to get a grip on reality. This alone has made many fans feel better - just knowing why some people got so 'crazy'. This post also includes a link to every other post or article I have written about the subject of Twilight addictions, because this is where it all started. It was written one month after the misogynistic 'cheating' scandal, August 2012.

In fact, as a contrast to the 'mom' email, below - here is a response from a young fan to the above post; and yes, I still receive emails like this: “…Thank you for writing that wonderful blog.. it was heaven sent. …Please someone tell him. He just texted me and said he told my mom..and for me to get some help..and bye..please tell him..everyone is doing this and its killing me..but everybody acts like they don’t know what im talking about..I think I may have never needed anything so bad in all of my life than for somebody to tell him..I know they are trying to drive me crazy..and its starting to work… thanks again, was truly a blessing I needed to read..very much so :)”

If you’re wondering WHY a fan of ‘robsten’ would say such nice things to me – again, she isn’t the only one – it’s because I did a lot of ‘forgiving’ and ‘explaining’ about what was ACTUALLY going on at the beginning of the ‘cheating’ scandal. Yeah, I was one of those strange people who was feeling really sorry for Twilight’s hurting fangirlz.

This is actually a very normal-sounding email for me to receive; and often from a mom and/or older grandma. But not always, teenagers are smarter than us all concerning this issue - and frankly, those are the intimidating emails to get. *I* had BETTER 'have my sh*t straight' because there is no fury like an obsessed teenage girl scorned!!! I am not even SORT of afraid of you mean older chicks who like to accuse me of having a crush on Kristen, LoL! ;)

I have condensed this email exchange (in places) to make it shorter:

to: Catherine Mostly "auntmisfitchick@gmail.com"
date: Sun, Aug 16, 2015 at 9:21 PM
subject: Re: Twilight Blog

I read your blog post on Twilight addiction and it really spoke to me. I really do need some advice on my own situation.

After years of mocking Twilight and their fans, I saw the movies featured on Netflix and I thought "why not". I clicked on Twilight and I absolutely loved it. I then went to watch the other movies and loved it even more... Any spare moment I get on my iPad and watch it. I can't stop.

I feel like I can't talk about this to my friends. I am a 20-something, single mother with a Masters in Business and I'm obsessing like a teenage girl over a guy she doesn't really know. Feel like I'm going insane here. I am addicted to Twilight.

Please, if you have any advice on getting over my Twilight addiction I would be ever so grateful!

My Response:

…sure the obsession is fun for awhile - but what about your real life later on when it is so hard to get past? Some ladies/girls haven't been able to do that, yet – and for some them, it’s been years (since before the movies).

I'm not sure if you have read the post I wrote about how to get over Twilight. Here it is in case you haven't. Yeah, it's long-winded, but it has helped some people. I don't hear from everyone, of course.

The most constructive advice I have - and you will see this in that post; is that you kind of just need to keep letting yourself glide through it for awhile. Since you can't turn obsessions on/off like a light switch - and we are NOT talking about an addiction as dangerous as meth - it is okay to take the long way around.

It's okay, because most of us - I can't speak for everyone, of course - are taking these characters and this story and 'doing what we want' with them, now. This is semi-healthy fantasy play that has the potential to help you realize some of your own dreams and maybe even how to attain them.

What are you doing with the characters? What are you often talking about in their conversations? Where are you trying to make them go... Those are the important questions. The obsession 'can' just be used as a tool instead of an obstruction in your life.

No, I'm not a therapist... I've just been through a lot of different kinds of obsessions, ha!

Relax. Your mind is fixated because there is something about it that you miss - or want - or need, etc. You'll figure it out; and when you don't need it anymore... Weeeeeeeeeeee. ;)

Does that help, at all? You are welcome to go on and on... Sometimes the vent helps a lot, too.

Thanks for writing. You're going to be fine. You are fine. :)
____________________

to: Catherine Mostly "auntmisfitchick@gmail.com"

date: Tue, Aug 18, 2015 at 8:02 PM
subject: Re: Twilight Blog

Thank you so much for the reply. I have tried speaking to my good friend about my obsession and, as with all of my friends, doesn't like Twilight and totally judged me lol so your feedback means a lot. Yes I do feel for the die hard fans who have been there from the beginning... I read one post where one middle aged married woman had damaged her relationship with her children and got divorced because of her Twilight obsession!

Yes you're right, on the obstruction and using it as a tool. Asking those questions are important. I am a really visual/logical person and the story depicted the emotions visually to the point where it captured my fantasy on my wishful thinking. Made me feel like I was an innocent girl, minus all the life experience of hurt and distrust gained from previous relationships. I saw the feelings a person can have from love. I have a love hate relationship with thinking logically and indulging in the fantasy Twilight brings out in me emotionally is like a drug to me.

I struggled with confidence in the past and thought of myself as ordinary, being attracted to "bad boys" who were mainly deadbeats but I thought they were amazing. I'm now trying to detach myself as Bella: the clumsy, country girl mesmerised by this perfect guy who treated/respected her like a goddess and had golden eyes with skin that shone like diamonds; Then to go on to have adventures and excitement after meeting Edward. That feeling of acceptance, love, belonging and family.

I'm trying to visualise myself as a metaphoric vampire with all the positive things that makes them unique (and the upperclass lifestyle); and that I can gain all the above and the feelings/mindset by being proactive in getting those things for myself... Someone has to do the groundwork to get from A to B. Even in the fantasy - it didn't happen from wishful thinking... 

Easier said than done, of course.

I don't know if this perspective is more of a "tool" or not... Or more helpful Character metaphor in approaching my addiction.... What do you think from your experience?
_______________

Previous Blog Excerpt: One of the really nifty things about obsessions and fantasies is that they are very personal and organic things. They can be started, then stopped and recreated over and over again in our minds whenever we need them to change.

If you don't like how any one fantasy is going, rethink it... Do it over again... What would YOU do with these pretty Twilight characters if Stephenie Meyer's dream had been YOUR dream...

This is helpful fantasy play because now you are taking these characters where you want them to go - instead of Stephenie. YOU are Bella now... or Alice or Rosalie or Esme or one of their amazing Cullen husbands. ;)

And what about you team Jacob fans... Surely you could come up with a better love story for Jacob and Bella?

My Email Response:

The first thing my brain started doing after watching the first Twilight movie was to rewrite both Bella and Edward in my mind - cuz they were both so shallow and easy to rewrite. I didn't 'quite' like either character, but I really wanted to, ha! (I will also add that I LOVED the character of Alice and didn't change a single thing about her. ;)

[Insert: Btw, I was just re-reading this post from before the cheating scandal; and it is specifically-directed at 'clueless' and young fans. I didn't realize at the time, that I was also giving advice on how to get past a Twilight obsession (at the end) - but, I pretty much tell them the same thing that I tell the TwiMom in this email exchange.

Maybe since it is written in a different way; you'll be able to 'get' this perspective if the one below seems too weird - or maybe a combo of the two would work best.]

The fantasy took off from there in several different directions - I have yet another blog about those fantasies that popped up. Some of them are kind of good in my opinion. :) http://adifferenttwilight.blogspot.com/ I even rewrote Twilight 'believably' so that people could see that could have been done.

Yeah, I was seriously addicted for awhile and mad about it, to boot, ha! It's not like you can unwatch something or reclaim wasted time.

In fact, this is the most hysterical (and probably bravest) thing I have ever done... I made a video for Stephenie Meyer calling her out (actually, I made four videos). I did these videos at the very height of my own obsession - before I 'rewrote' anything; before I had ever heard of '50 Shades of Grey'; and before Kristen Stewart's stupid 'cheating' scandal...

The above blog, A Different Twilight, was my way 'out' of my obsession. I did not start to climb out until I started writing that blog (and again, I did the 'mean obsession videos' before I started writing).

I had to be talked into watching Twilight the first time because *I* was not even SORT of interested in the concept of 'sparkling vampires'. For years, I just thought, oh well... this is the vampire thing of this generation. I already had Buffy and Interview with the Vamp along with many other vampire faves - I wasn't even curious about Twilight.

I've been all kinds of obsessed with different things throughout my life - people, shows, characters, etc; but I have never had an obsession hit me so hard so fast. That is why I started researching The Twilight Saga and how it was written... I was like, wtf?!!

I'm not addicted anymore; and have been looking back on it for at least two years, now - what a stupid, wild ride. I am someone who 'naturally' lives much more in their heads; and for people like me, getting out of that deep of an obsession seemed damn near impossible.

It was like quicksand - the more I fought it and tried to 'get out'; the more I sank.

But, I'm still here and can look back on it now with nothing less than a profound set of the giggles if I start thinking about it too much. I really could just giggle about it to high heaven while cussing Stephenie Meyer out up one side and down the other at the same time, LoL!

I don't know if you have read my stuff on 'why' we are all got so unusually-addicted to this series - but that is why, because of the too-shallow characters & storyline. Most of us have Bella re-written in our heads to be 'more like us'; or at least, someone we would like to be. (More explanation about that in here - Why do so many people hate Bella Swan and/or Kristen Stewart)

That is why I suggested that you continue to 'glide' through your obsession for a while longer... 

You are thinking about that character as 'Bella'; but the obsession is so strong because the line between her and you is probably a lot more thin than you realize. You've probably done things to 'personalize' Bella. For instance, *I* made her a writer. (I was also trying to get Edward and the Cullens to build her a ship to take her into space because I'm such a scifi nut, LoL!)

Change her name and make her 'you' - it would be the same difference. HOWEVER, maintaining a division between the two like that is a good thing. Some ladies literally cannot separate themselves from Bella in their minds, yet - especially people who also read the books; but 'just' movie fans can have problems with this, too. 

Some of us are just more susceptible to falling into fictional obsessions than others - just like some people have an easier time falling into 'actual' drugs. You are right, a Twilight addiction is a drug - hands down, no-doubt.

Obsessions like this create the emotional highs that we crave like a heroine addict craves the way heroine makes them feel. And, make no mistake, this addiction is just as hard to get past - it just doesn't (usually) manifest in ways that makes us change our lives considerably or cause us to die.

Plus, we can't help it for a while; and it is silly... is it any wonder that we get made fun of?

In order to use your fantasies to get out of the obsession; the variations that come up in your mind (my mind, anyway) seemed like steps. I think because we are meshing the obsession with real life - the real life 'thread' kind of acts like a rope to help us pull ourselves out.

Plus again, can help us realize stuff about ourselves that we needed to know.

I don't mean that we take the time to sit down and actually 'rewrite' Bella, of course - but, we have variations of subtle (and sometimes major) alterations about her and/or Edward that make us like her better. For instance, *my* Bella doesn't have to beg Edward for anything; and he isn't saving her over and over again because she's a weak human.

When we make the fantasy / obsessions 'ours' instead of Stephenie's (that's what it originally was); then it seems easier to pull ourselves out and learn from it. You can even go so far as to use the characters as 'imaginary friends' as long as you need them in your real life. That isn't 'being crazy' - that is being extremely creative in using your imagination to get you out of a potent addiction.

I cannot tell you how many long, ridiculous conversations I've had with Edward Cullen about anything and everything. That is one aspect of the 'universal female fantasy' that Stephenie captured very well - we LIKE our fantasy men to be interested in what we are saying, no matter what, ha!

I hope all that makes sense. When talking about obsessions while not being an official therapist - sometimes things are hard to explain. :)

date:     Mon, Aug 24, 2015 at 8:04 PM
subject:                Re: Twilight Blog

Hi Catherine,

I really took in what you said, and gaining an understanding of why people get addicted to twilight based on how it was written has helped. There were many things about the characters I didn't quite like: and based on what you explained, I understand why I never 'fully' imagined myself as Bella and related to her personality/character.... Much like you said: " Bella doesn't have to beg Edward for anything; and he isn't saving her over and over again". That sort of annoys me about Bella.

I'm not a fan of how Stephanie depicted vampires of 'sparkling ' either, as this is like Bella idolizes Edward etc and it's a bit kind of tacky for vampires. I think Stephanie could have been a little bit more creative with that as its represents ALL vampires... I mean, I don't know about you, but I can't really see antagonists like Aro or Laurant sparkling like diamonds and being 'beautiful '.

So totally get what you explained about rewriting to be more like us or who we want to be.
The way I want to rewrite and 'improve' Bella is who I am and how I want people to see me. I believe that I'm a naturally 'free spirited' person, who likes to be in control of my own life, career oriented, value friendship and need time to myself... So I would want to rewrite edward too.

Edward is very controlling, he is so dedicated to the relationship to the point of nothing else matters... and he is oft protective. He would be a prime candidate for a restraining order! Haha.

I've read online of girls addicted to twilight and some have mentioned that they look for guys 'like' Edward. Whereas I'm addicted to twilight but I don't like everything about Edward so would rewrite him based on what 'I' like. We put ourselves in twilight and not just 'go along on the ride' like you would in LOTR or Star Wars.... Yeah, that Stephanie knows how to suck us girls in! XD

I was beginning to 'write' another character in 'my' twilight... I was toying around with the idea of this character meeting Edward during the period when Edward first became a vampire, when he was killing these murderers and maybe involving the Volturi more...

As I was creating this character and Upon analysis, She has traits like me/who I want to be. I even make her look similar to me. So essentially I'm investing myself even more into the film. I don't know if this is a great thing because there isn't a "division " like you said.

I'm the same as you in the sense of living in my own head (closeted huge nerd).... I'm a fan of RPG games and create back stories for my characters and join game communities to role play lol. I even created an entire history on a race in Elderscrolls (RPG adventure/fantasy game)! That obsession has died down a bit now given I have done every single quest in the game lol

Oh btw, I love the idea of the Cullens in outer space!!! XD

My Response:

LoL! Nah, you got it right, you don't need anymore 'division' - it's just that some people really do need one, ya know? I was actually really into creating a silly parallel universe with a second Bella and Edward who would somehow collide with the originals and 'explain how everything should be', LoL! It got pretty funny sometimes. :)

I have always heard that Edward is very controlling in their relationship, but I never read the books all the way through yet - so I don't have that part in my head. You can sure see how 50 Shades of Grey came about, though. The first time I heard that Twilight had inspired fanfiction like that I laughed so hard. Really - tears down my cheeks and everything, ha!

And honestly, I think taking Bella into space would have been a great idea. Steph really missed out on that one. ;)

It sounds like you are feeling better. Good.

If you're as hooked as I was on this story.... Again, you might even need to take the characters with you in your everyday life and treat them as you would imaginary friends for as long as you need them. They can actually help iron out the most ridiculous things (especially Alice, ha!) when you are talking to them/yourself.

Btw, I'm a HUGE gamer girl nerd from the way back - I used to play Ultima Online ages ago and currently play in Stronghold Kingdoms MMO. It's not nearly the same as UO, nor as 'social' - but there is something about it that I like.

You're probably not in the mood for anything but amber eyes, beautiful music and flying through the treetops... That's Okay, it's not like real life is much more 'real' than the imaginary escapes we take. And I believe they can and do inspire us to seek the things we find fascinating about them in our actual real lives (eventually).

No, I haven't found my rl Edward yet and I will probably never make it into space, ha! But dreams can lead us to real happiness - if there is such a thing. And if nothing else, you'll be in a much better place in the future for people to understand this unusual perspective. For instance, when your daughter goes through this (and you know she will, ha!); you'll probably be a better mom about it.

I get letters from obsessed young girls who cannot talk to their moms about this - or anyone else that they know around them - because they get made fun of and/or told that they 'need help' (We kind of get that right? Ha!). And of course, some fans are hung up on Kristen Stewart and some hate her, now - yet another division among friends & family.

And it's all so silly so it doesn't get taken seriously... These obsessions really are quite funny and heartbreaking at the same time.

Thanks so much for writing, S. It always makes me feel better if I can help someone feel even a little bit better - kind of like a steam vent, maybe. I know I wish I had had one. If it helps you get back to focusing on the things you really love (like your little girl) faster; then it is totally worth it. *I* spent waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time spinning through this bs the hard way - by trying to ignore it and push it out of my head. That is just not possible for some of us. :)

Peace.

Catherine
auntmisfitchick@gmail.com

August 2012, one month after the ‘cheating’ scandal started; and yes, I still receive emails like this: “…Thank you for writing that wonderful blog.. it was heaven sent. …Please someone tell him. He just texted me and said he told my mom..and for me to get some help..and bye..please tell him..everyone is doing this and its killing me..but everybody acts like they don’t know what im talking about..I think I may have never needed anything so bad in all of my life than for somebody to tell him..I know they are trying to drive me crazy..and its starting to work… thanks again, was truly a blessing I needed to read..very much so :)”
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How to get past Robert Pattinson / Edward Cullen & Kristen Stewart / Bella Swan

Some Fangirlz are especially flailing over Robert Pattinson and/or Kristen Stewart because of the ongoing tabloids assaults against them. Plus, it can be really hard for some people to separate the actors from their favorite characters.

But, the scandals are long over - no more judgments; it's time to figure out how to move on. It's NOT LIKE Kristen Stewart is actually Bella Swan; and she already has a happy ending conveniently written out for her - nor does Robert, for that matter.

This is what I told one TwiLady (who turned out to be a grandma) who was feeling like she was too-hung-up on Robert and feeling awfully sorry for him.You can also apply this to KRISTEN if she is the one you are hung up on...

"Do you have any other Robert Pattinson movies to watch other than Twilight? Try to forget about Kristen and what she did for awhile, that will be easier to do if you're watching Rob in something else. Then watch another movie of his and then another one - watch them over. Watch him until he isn't Edward Cullen and/or Kristen Stewart's victimized boyfriend to you anymore.

He's a very talented, beautiful guy who pours himself into every character he takes on. That takes internal STRENGTH and emotional fortitude - along with one hell of an imagination. He's DYNAMIC with REAL Human feelings, ideas and interests BEYOND even Kristen Stewart and certainly US, ha!

Don't wonder about "what he's like" as his Human self - wonder about things like, "How was that character created? Who created him and why? How would Robert Pattinson prepare for a scene like that"?

I saw the movie Cosmopolis (this is my movie review - LOVED it!!), and I wondered that about the "strut" he did through the alley - he HAD to have practiced that, ha!

IF you can dislodge your CURRENT perspective about him into something more realistic - you SHOULD be able to watch Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 and Part 2 alot sooner without all that extra static going on inside of you; PLUS, it will probably make all the other movies he does more enjoyable for you because you'll be seeing HIM 'as whomever' - not just as Edward Cullen. ;)

It's almost like both he and Kristen are "too real" to us because we know so much about their personal lives. Take him back into your obscure fantasy world and let him become the fantasy guy he was once again - WITHOUT "who he REALLY is" weighing in on things.

Because NONE of us will EVER get close enough to him to get to know the real Robert Pattinson - and frankly, we probably wouldn't want to get to know him like that. Because when people go from being a fantasy to 'real' Human to us - that's when we lose our magical fantasy ideals surrounding them and they become "just like us" - not NEARLY as interesting, ha!

And the MAGIC that comes from him is JUST as REAL as the facts. So many of us have LOST that magic through this PR assault. Some peeps need to find a way to let it go, and SOME (maybe you) need to find a way to reconfigure it cuz it isn't going to go ANYWHERE.

Perhaps you cherish it too much. Nothing AT ALL wrong with that. :)" 

Need More?
and why so many fans of ALL AGES - and especially older women -
became so addicted.  This post also includes a link to every other
post or article I have written about the subject; because this is where it all started.
This was written one month after the misogynistic 'cheating' scandal, August 2012.
This post gives us all a REASON to FORGIVE overly-obsessing
Twihards & Anti-Twihards who just CAN'T seem to get a grip on reality. :)