An obsession is an obsession. You can either utilize this information and feel better; or not - the choice is your's.
This post was created for absolutely everyone who struggles with a Twilight (or anti-twilight - yes!!) obsession - even the mean girls - because so many of them simply do not realize what they are doing and/or cannot stop themselves. Strong obsessions are hard for most people to control, no matter what they are obsessing over.
This post is designed to help obsessing fans feel better - NOT 'get rid of' an obsession. Most fans do not want it to go away, they just want a little more control in their lives and/or to feel better about it. Because no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a Twilight obsession if you have one. You'll see why if you keep reading.
...And besides, the obsession will drift away slowly, eventually - like it is supposed to. That is inevitable. But, how to manage it while it is so strong and still move forward in your life? That is the burning question... :)
This is going to seem like a long-winded ramble. But, trust me, I've been there ahead of you and made it! If you are struggling with an intense obsession over Twilight, Edward Cullen, Bella Swan, Kristen Stewart or Robert Pattinson... You are not alone or unusual; and a long, slow read is probably better for your brain. Just take this one line/word/paragraph at a time and save it to return to later if you need it.
I am including a current email from a mom in this beginning so you can see how fans are (still) dealing with their obsessions. No one is talking about this stuff – you’ll hear the typical reason why fans don’t talk about it in this exchange.
This is a reply to a question that shoots off from the reviews of Twilight on Amazon. There are over six thousand replies to this question, most of them similar to this one. Read more if you need more convincing.
NEWS FLASH... NEWS FLASH... NEWS FLASH... Not everything is about "our obsession" - MOST of your obsessions out there are FINE. It's the pain that comes from seeing your favorite fairytale and favorite actress and actor being so tormented by your own Twihard Sisters and the world that is harsh.
It would be so helpful if Summit / Lionsgate could come up with a continuing series or something - if they could manage to 'do it right'. Twihard fans didn't deserve to have their favorite fairytale ruined by Hollywood's celebrity-lifebashing ways. The likelihood of the studio finding a way to continue this series before the scandal happened was probably pretty high. Twilight had been nothing but profitable up to that point.
Here is one of my original posts about Twilight obsessions (don't read this, yet - you'll come to it again); and why so many fans of ALL AGES - and especially older women - became so addicted. This gives us all a reason to forgive overly-obsessing Twihards & Anti-Twihards out there who just CAN'T seem to get a grip on reality. This alone has made many fans feel better - just knowing why some people got so 'crazy'. This post also includes a link to every other post or article I have written about the subject of Twilight addictions, because this is where it all started. It was written one month after the misogynistic 'cheating' scandal, August 2012.
In fact, as a contrast to the 'mom' email, below - here is a response from a young fan to the above post; and yes, I still receive emails like this: “…Thank you for writing that wonderful blog.. it was heaven sent. …Please someone tell him. He just texted me and said he told my mom..and for me to get some help..and bye..please tell him..everyone is doing this and its killing me..but everybody acts like they don’t know what im talking about..I think I may have never needed anything so bad in all of my life than for somebody to tell him..I know they are trying to drive me crazy..and its starting to work… thanks again, was truly a blessing I needed to read..very much so :)”
If you’re wondering WHY a fan of ‘robsten’ would say such nice things to me – again, she isn’t the only one – it’s because I did a lot of ‘forgiving’ and ‘explaining’ about what was ACTUALLY going on at the beginning of the ‘cheating’ scandal. Yeah, I was one of those strange people who was feeling really sorry for Twilight’s hurting fangirlz.
I have condensed this email exchange (in places) to make it shorter:
date: Sun, Aug 16, 2015 at 9:21 PM
subject: Re: Twilight Blog
to: Catherine Mostly "firstname.lastname@example.org"
date: Tue, Aug 18, 2015 at 8:02 PM
subject: Re: Twilight Blog
Thank you so much for the reply. I have tried speaking to my good friend about my obsession and, as with all of my friends, doesn't like Twilight and totally judged me lol so your feedback means a lot. Yes I do feel for the die hard fans who have been there from the beginning... I read one post where one middle aged married woman had damaged her relationship with her children and got divorced because of her Twilight obsession!
Yes you're right, on the obstruction and using it as a tool. Asking those questions are important. I am a really visual/logical person and the story depicted the emotions visually to the point where it captured my fantasy on my wishful thinking. Made me feel like I was an innocent girl, minus all the life experience of hurt and distrust gained from previous relationships. I saw the feelings a person can have from love. I have a love hate relationship with thinking logically and indulging in the fantasy Twilight brings out in me emotionally is like a drug to me.
If you don't like how any one fantasy is going, rethink it... Do it over again... What would YOU do with these pretty Twilight characters if Stephenie Meyer's dream had been YOUR dream...
This is helpful fantasy play because now you are taking these characters where you want them to go - instead of Stephenie. YOU are Bella now... or Alice or Rosalie or Esme or one of their amazing Cullen husbands. ;)
And what about you team Jacob fans... Surely you could come up with a better love story for Jacob and Bella?
The first thing my brain started doing after watching the first Twilight movie was to rewrite both Bella and Edward in my mind - cuz they were both so shallow and easy to rewrite. I didn't 'quite' like either character, but I really wanted to, ha! (I will also add that I LOVED the character of Alice and didn't change a single thing about her. ;)
The fantasy took off from there in several different directions - I have yet another blog about those fantasies that popped up. Some of them are kind of good in my opinion. :) http://adifferenttwilight.
The above blog, A Different Twilight, was my way 'out' of my obsession. I did not start to climb out until I started writing that blog (and again, I did the 'mean obsession videos' before I started writing).
I had to be talked into watching Twilight the first time because *I* was not even SORT of interested in the concept of 'sparkling vampires'. For years, I just thought, oh well... this is the vampire thing of this generation. I already had Buffy and Interview with the Vamp along with many other vampire faves - I wasn't even curious about Twilight.
It was like quicksand - the more I fought it and tried to 'get out'; the more I sank.
That is why I suggested that you continue to 'glide' through your obsession for a while longer...
I cannot tell you how many long, ridiculous conversations I've had with Edward Cullen about anything and everything. That is one aspect of the 'universal female fantasy' that Stephenie captured very well - we LIKE our fantasy men to be interested in what we are saying, no matter what, ha!
Oh btw, I love the idea of the Cullens in outer space!!! XD
August 2012, one month after the ‘cheating’ scandal started; and yes, I still receive emails like this: “…Thank you for writing that wonderful blog.. it was heaven sent. …Please someone tell him. He just texted me and said he told my mom..and for me to get some help..and bye..please tell him..everyone is doing this and its killing me..but everybody acts like they don’t know what im talking about..I think I may have never needed anything so bad in all of my life than for somebody to tell him..I know they are trying to drive me crazy..and its starting to work… thanks again, was truly a blessing I needed to read..very much so :)”
How to get past Robert Pattinson / Edward Cullen & Kristen Stewart / Bella Swan
This is what I told one TwiLady (who turned out to be a grandma) who was feeling like she was too-hung-up on Robert and feeling awfully sorry for him.You can also apply this to KRISTEN if she is the one you are hung up on...
"Do you have any other Robert Pattinson movies to watch other than Twilight? Try to forget about Kristen and what she did for awhile, that will be easier to do if you're watching Rob in something else. Then watch another movie of his and then another one - watch them over. Watch him until he isn't Edward Cullen and/or Kristen Stewart's victimized boyfriend to you anymore.
Don't wonder about "what he's like" as his Human self - wonder about things like, "How was that character created? Who created him and why? How would Robert Pattinson prepare for a scene like that"?
I saw the movie Cosmopolis (this is my movie review - LOVED it!!), and I wondered that about the "strut" he did through the alley - he HAD to have practiced that, ha!
IF you can dislodge your CURRENT perspective about him into something more realistic - you SHOULD be able to watch Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 and Part 2 alot sooner without all that extra static going on inside of you; PLUS, it will probably make all the other movies he does more enjoyable for you because you'll be seeing HIM 'as whomever' - not just as Edward Cullen. ;)
It's almost like both he and Kristen are "too real" to us because we know so much about their personal lives. Take him back into your obscure fantasy world and let him become the fantasy guy he was once again - WITHOUT "who he REALLY is" weighing in on things.
And the MAGIC that comes from him is JUST as REAL as the facts. So many of us have LOST that magic through this PR assault. Some peeps need to find a way to let it go, and SOME (maybe you) need to find a way to reconfigure it cuz it isn't going to go ANYWHERE.
Perhaps you cherish it too much. Nothing AT ALL wrong with that. :)"
This post gives us all a REASON to FORGIVE overly-obsessing
Twihards & Anti-Twihards who just CAN'T seem to get a grip on reality. :)